"She tell you she an orphan; even after you meet her family."~~The Counting Crows
All of us have a good side and a bad side. I believe most of us really want to be good people. Sometimes I ask others to spat my hand when I just can't help but be bad. It is like sometimes I just have to vent. Sometimes I just talk too, much. Blood is thick, I know this, but I try to call a spade a spade. I tell so many stories about my grandmother that I am really afraid that I may be in for it. I want to be just as much an influence as a grandma as mine were to me. I have told the good and the bad about mine. Getting older I realize that my girls may be right in poking fun at me. "You do what you got to do"; that has always been my motto. Don't sweat the small stuff. Sometimes my motto's were not my mottos. In the rush of things, many steps are left out. Procedure is a thing that in a house filled with babies and baby things is hard to follow; even if taking more time would make it easier. I have never considered this chapter in my life, but it is upon me. I am really not as old as I am making myself out to be. It is just this seems the last leg of my rat race of a life. I am wiser than I once was and really do wish that I knew then what I know now. Hard work is really not all that hard to do. Getting something done is easier than putting it off. Keeping things up is easier than letting it become a pile. I was not the Leave it to Beaver mom, by any means. I used Dreft washing powders for maybe two weeks. I used cloth diapers for maybe a month. The only formula/breast milk thing lasted about two months; then it was cereal to fill 'em up and make 'em sleep. I arrived at my grandmother's house when I was seven. She took over my mama's job, not to my mama's liking. The constant battle between them two women was never ending. This was serious stuff, now. The chores that mama tried to do were never done the way Grandmother wanted them to be done. It was nothing for the two of them to have a small cat fight, a little slapping and hair pulling was all; not funny, but kind of funny? Grandmother being the older really did win most of the time, but Mama I think just let her. Mama really had the more surrendering personality. Grandmother was boss, we all new that. Something we all gather along the way; the people we let control us, or let them think they do.