April 11, 2012

Laugh and the World Laughs With You; Cry and You Cry Alone

Knowing that with-in you are basically a good productive person helps, but if you hear or are reminded of your short comings constantly you tend to start believing them. There were six grandchildren under the great wings of my grandmother. I was the one she guided the most. I was a target for all she wanted to mold. Most of the time there were only four of us at grandmother's. My brother and I lived with her and the boys of my daddy's brother, stayed while their mom worked. On one particular day all six of us were there, mowing the front yard. The mowing was done in a way that Grandmother had organized. The system for mowing was we mowed in a circle around the front yard and took four rounds each; then it was the next kids turn to push the lawn mower. This meant we all had a lenthy break from mowing. Hanging around the other kids was not what I chose to do during my break that day. We had puppies that I wanted to play with behind the house. The litter had six puppies. I had named one of them Lucy, she was my favorite. I went to play with her while I was waiting for my turn to mow. Maybe I was not the best pet handler. I liked to rub the puppies faces and make them bite and growl. This time I made Lucy the pup very mad at me. She snapped and bit the shit out of me. It hurt really bad and pissed me off to the max. I was crying mad and having a hissy fit, because the dog had bitten me. I was still furious when it came my time to mow. The rest of the kids really thought it was funny that Lucy had bitten me. Grandmother came out to check on the progress of the yard and noticed I was mad and crying. She was not too concerned that I had been bitten, but that I was having such a mad fit. Her answer to the whole situation was that I should get a hold on my temper/nerves or I was going to be just like my Mama who at the time was in Tuscaloosa's mental hospital. OK, now this was great. I have been bitten by a dog and since I am crying/mad I am insane. To this day I am still waiting for the day that I go insane. My solution to this has always been; I would have a nervous breakdown today, but I can't, I have to go to work.

"The wonderful thing about storytelling is you don't have to be perfect," ~~Katherine Tucker Windham

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